on the lawn

On the clothesline

Mom’s going to teach me how to put it all together, I’ve never actually turned a quilt top into an actual blanket, so I’m looking forward to that part. Then I need to decide what to do with it. I have no need for yet another quilt. Anyone interested?

Stardust

So after having just completed the Stardust book, I found out there was a movie. Usually I don’t like the film adaptations of books, but Stardust read like it should be a film, so I was excited to see how it was executed.

I think that overall, the movie captured the spirit of the book. There were large deviations, sometimes for budgetary or special effects reasons, and sometimes I’m assuming to beef up the action. The only thing that really disappointed me was the climax of the book was completely different than that of the movie. I was really looking forward to seeing it executed, and the scenes in the witches’ hut fell short because of my expectations.

I didn’t really like the guy playing Tristran/Tristain at first. I thought he got the scene with Victoria in England absolutely dead on, but once he was in the fairy land, I thought he was dull and didn’t really enjoy him. I don’t think he was earnest enough for some reason. I really enjoyed how he looked after he got the long hair. Long haired Tristain was very hot, and looked very much a fairy tale hero.

I loved the witches. They were perfect. I also loved Robert DeNiro as the gay air pirate, a role that was seriously beefed up from the book. The scenes on the air ship were wonderful, and I thought they were the best part of the movie. Like I said before, the ending fell flat.

Overall, I would recommend both the book and the movie to people who like stuff like The Princess Bride. And seriously, if you don’t like The Princess Bride, I’m not sure I can be friends with you.

Neil Gaiman - Stardust

So Stardust is sort of like The Princess Bride but not quite. If I had read these two books at similar times, they would be fighting for supremacy in my heart, but alas, it’s not to be. I am old and married and that special place in my heart that used to be filled with fairy tale love interests has been filled up with the awesome things my Alan does for me on a daily basis. And Westley from the Princess Bride cause he’s just that awesome. But I digress. Let me tell you about this Neil Gaiman book I read.

Tristran Thorn is half mortal and half… well, I’m not really sure. Let’s say semi-magical fairy man. He lives in the human town of Wall, and he loves Victoria something or other. He is trying to get her to fall in love with him when she says that she will do so only if he catches the falling star that fell off on the other side of the Wall. But the wall is magical and is a gateway to the land of fairies and pixies and witches and all sorts of other whimsical and wonderful things. He sets off on an epic adventure, being helped along the way by strange creatures, and eventually catching up with the fallen star, who doesn’t really like him. But this is a love story, so the eventually fall in love, and there’s a unicorn fighting a bear or something, and everyone wants the star because stars are awesome or something. You’d think I’d be able to remember details, but I really can’t. I do remember it was all very wonderful and magical and charming.

So, here’s my roundup of this book: I love Neil Gaiman’s writing. If he wrote the menu at Starbucks, I’d have to get myself a copy. Therefore, I’m not very unbiased. I’m going to like this book, and I did. I thought it was a kid’s book until the sex and cursing started, and it made me happy that it wasn’t. It definitely falls into the same category of book as The Princess Bride, and like I said before, in another lifetime they could have been contenders.

Alas.

For those of you who have been following along, I have reviewed seven books today. I didn’t finish all of them today. It’s been a while since I went through my reading list, and though some of these reviews were half-assed, they’re now off my to-do list, and that makes me supremely happy.

Haruki Murakami - Norwegian Wood

So as I just finished saying, I dove into Norwegian Wood immediately after finishing Dance Dance Dance. I picked it up on my last day in Ireland, and intended to read it on the plane, but it took three false starts to actually get interested in this book. It revolves around life and death, the past and the future, sanity and its edges. I’m sure I missed a lot in this book. It was a lot less gonzo and bizarre than Dance Dance Dance. I love Murakami’s way of describing events in convoluted ways; like a photograph with a very small focal point, most scenes are fuzzy except for one tiny spot. And like my photography skills, often the most unexpected things are the ones in focus; the smell of the trees, the feeling of the rain on the narrator’s skin, the smell of a dorm room.

I liked Dance Dance Dance more than Norwegian Wood, and really enjoyed both.

Haruki Murakami - Dance Dance Dance

Ok, so usually at the beginning of my reviews I tell you what a book’s about. Here’s the problem: I’m not really sure what the hell happened in this book. All I know is that it was awesome. Like, what was it with that guy in the sheepskin? And the crazy hotel? And how was everyone intrinsically linked to the dead hooker? And how in the end, is this book really just a super-convoluted love story?

None of it makes sense, and it does so in the most wonderful possible way. It is an assault on one’s common sense, and I loved every second of it. Except the dead hooker stuff. The other dead people were okay though.

When I finished this book, I hit Alan with it and asked him how it was possible that he allowed me to live to twenty seven years of age without reading one of Murakami’s books, and he pouted a little bit, because he’s often encouraged me to read some of his works. I immediately went out and picked up Murakami’s most famout work, Norwegian Wood

Cormac McCarthy - The Road

For 307 pages, a man and his son walk down the road, avoiding cannibals and looking for food. The world as we know it has ended, and been replaced with an eternally gray, cold world. Gangs of cannibals roam the countryside, and atrocities lie around every corner. Starvation is always near, and this book was really boring.

If anyone out there liked Zen And The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance, they might like this book. if so, can you please comment below so I can get rid of this book?

Zoe Heller - Notes On A Scandal

Notes On A Scandal tells the story of Sheba Hart, a teacher who begins an affair with one of her underage students. It is narrated by a fellow teacher, Barbara, an older teacher, overly critical and jealous of all around her. The novel recounts the events as Barbara eventually learns them in the form of journal entries. Barbara begins writing the journal after the scandal has become public knowledge, and she has been forced into retirement, and Sheba charged for her crimes. The notes are never objective, and you can feel Barbara’s contempt, loneliness and anger at the world seethe between the lines. Her criticisms of those around her ring true, and I found the book very funny.

I’m not sure it was supposed to be funny.

I really enjoyed reading Notes On A Scandal. It’s certainly not high literature, but it was a fun read, and I have passed it on to friends who I hope will also enjoy it. I have never spent time in a staff room at an elementary school, but I imagine that her characterizations of teachers, saying what they really think about the students behind those closed doors was spot on. I loved to hate Barbara, and I think it was her portrayal of the events that made the book so fascinating and enjoyable for me.

Neil Gaiman - The Graveyard Book

The Graveyard Book is a re-imagining of Rudyard Kipling’s The Jungle Book, set in an abandoned British graveyard. As a baby, Nobody Owen’s family is murdered by a mysterious man in black while Nobody wandered to the nearby graveyard. Here, the ghosts and other creatures of legend protect and raise him as a community. His teacher is a mysterious creature named Silas, and his parents a pair of childless ghosts. When the man in black returns to the village to hunt down the baby he did not manage to kill, all hell breaks loose.

The tale is entirely charming, and sufficiently creepy to be a wonderful introduction to the world of Neil Gaiman’s writing. I picked it up on my first weekday in Ireland, when I was too freaked out to drive, and too tired to keep walking around town. I sat for the rest of the day in a town park reading, and it was a great way to enjoy a lovely spring afternoon. As with most of Neil Gaiman’s writing, it was just the right level of creepy. I’m glad I didn’t find it as a kid, it would have freaked me out. I’m not really good at criticizing kid’s books because I don’t read enough of them, but I think it would probably be okay for kids around 12 or 13.

Douglas Coupland - Souvenir Of Canada

Douglas Coupland is one of the modern writers whose works I consistently love. Three or four of his novels rank among my favourites, and I always find his works at least entertaining. This book is a little different, as it is a coffee table book, not a novel. It had about forty short essays accompanied by photographs of things he considers to be quintessentially Canadian. I ran through it in a couple of days, and thought it was charming. It wasn’t until I traveled outside of North American that I also realized how accurate it was. I grew up being bombarded with American broadcast television and radio, preferring it to the Canadian alternatives. I never really felt that different than Americans, except when trying to build a Canadian identity. There is an awful lot of “we’re not American!” cheering when Canadians get together, which I have never really understood.

Anyways, back to the book. It was pretty nice. A nice addition to my Douglas Coupland collection, but definitely not required reading. I’m not a lover of coffee table books for the nice part, so having one that is a little cheeky and ironic is nice.

We went way north. Norther (more north?) than anyone else we know. We went eight hours north to see Lemmers and the rest of the Lemmers clan. Another pair of guys I went to high school with went as well. We left on Saturday morning at six, and got to Kirkland Lake around 3, and then proceded to drink beer and play euchre and Rock Band, and look at pretty stuff. We had fireworks with the neighbours, which were interrupted by a small firework injury, a small shed fire, and the OPP asking us about our fireworks permit. It was a great weekend. Despite the 1200 km we put on the car.

We brought both our cameras with us and here are the results:

It was a really nice weekend. The drive home wasn’t as terrible as I had been expecting, and I think Alan had just as good a time as I did. I hope that we will be able to go back for another weekend, or that the Lemmers clan can come south and see us some time this summer.