Burninate!
My Dalek zippo
Dear Mt. Eyjafjallajökull
I know you don’t know me personally, and I know you probably don’t come to strangely-normal.com very often, but I want to talk to you.
Last week, when I first learned of your existence, I thought that it was cute. Your erupting and sending the UK and Europe into a travel panic was almost endearing I thought. You were making your mark on the work, and I get it. It’s hard to stand out in a world this crazy, so sometimes you have to shout from the mountaintops. Who doesn’t like a David and Goliath type of tale: little Iceland shutting down the airspace for most of northern Europe? It’s so cool. There’s little balls of volcanic glass in the air. How cool is that? I didn’t know you could aerosolize glass. I’m glad I learned that.
Except here’s the problem. I’m going to Ireland. On Friday. On my belated honeymoon. Cheap. It’s going to be great. I’m really excited. And I would prefer that we actually get to go.
So here’s the deal. If you could just stop with the erupting for a bit, that would be great. Get the air space above Heathrow Airport open for Friday and Saturday, and allow Alan and I to land. I’m not really concerned about the Cork airport; we can get to Ireland from London by car or bus or train or rented mule for all I care. Then, if you could erupt again, and get us stranded in Ireland for a few weeks too long, that would also be great.
If you’re able to do this for me, I’m sure we can become friends. I will even learn how to pronounce your name correctly. If not, I may have to put you on my enemies list.
Sincerely,
Shannon Patterson
P.S. I really like your name.
Where’s My Jetpack?
Where's My Jetpack - Daniel H Wilson
Daniel H Wilson
2007, 182 pages
Remember watching Back To The Future Part II and loved the hover-board and all the awesome tech that was supposed to be available by 2015? Remember arriving last night into the wondrous future that is this shiny new decade and realizing that we don’t have flying cars, personal robot maids, or jetpacks? I was a little disappointed myself. Daniel Wilson’s book is about the bright and shiny future that never arrived.
The Roomba just isn't cutting it for me. When do I get my very own Rosie the Robot?
I got this book from Alan for Christmas, and may I say, it is so pretty and shiny. The cover has reflective silver and blue writing, the pages are gilded blue, and there are wonderful full-page blue, white and gray infographic-style illustrations accompanying each article. It is a really well put together book. The writing is snappy, engaging and witty. My only criticism is that is often seems like a well put together Wikipedia article. In fact, that smell-o-vision link I posted above? It gives identical information that the book gives. I don’t think there’s anything in this book you couldn’t find on WIkipedia. I think the real benefit of this book is it gives a fun, concise overview of cool new technologies that could have been if only our priorities or laws of physics were slightly different. Also, I don’t have an iPhone, so Wikipedia isn’t as portable as books are [citation needed].
This is the first book I’ve finished reading in 2010 and overall, I must say I thoroughly enjoyed it. I’m looking forward to reading more awesome books in the year to come. I’m going to try and keep track of them more accurately this year than I did last year.
Slightly off topic, but also relevant: The Future Soon by Johnathan Coulton is an awesome song. Go listen to it right now, I’ll wait. You can thank me later.
Shannon’s List of Must-See 80s Films
Shannon loves 80s films, and John Hughes’ passing is a great reason to revisit some of my favourites.
Say Anything
Not a John Hughes film, but the first movie made by Cameron Crowe, starring a very young John Cusack as Lloyd and Ione Skye as Diane. it’s got everything a teen flick should:
- John Cusack
- a great party
- a class issue (Lloyd is from the other side of the tracks, Diane is wealthy)
- parents that just don’t understand
- pure charm and hormones winning out over logic
- the boom-box scene
- Lloyd Dobler is probably the most sincere of the 80s love interests.
Sixteen Candles
Molly Ringwald’s in love with the most popular boy in school, and the nerdiest one loves her. What makes it a classic?
- Long Duk Dong.
- A kick ass party and a school dance
- a class issue (Samantha Baker’s decidedly lower class, Jake Ryan’s a rich boy)
- Anthony Michael Hall as Farmer Ted
- John Cusack (he’s one of the nerds)
- blatant racism
- a terrible wedding
- family that just doesn’t understand
- the birthday cake scene
Heathers
Winona Ryder and Christian Slater kill all the people who piss them off and then make it look like suicide. What’s not to love?
- a bay boy with a troubled past
- disinterested parents who just don’t understand
- ‘what’s your damage, heather?’
- that crazy pep rally after death number two
- class issues
Heathers is really a bit of an anomaly on this list, but it must stay. An honorable mention goes to Pump Up The Volume, also starring Christian Slater as a teen whose parents just don’t understand.
The Breakfast Club
Where would teen angst be with the Brat Pack? Arguably the apex of teen comedies, this one has it all.
- Judd Nelson as the bad boy from the wrong side of the tracks
- Molly Ringwald as the princess
- Ally Sheedy as the basket case
- Anthony Michael Hall as the nerd… again
- Emilio Estevez as the jock
- despite the fact that it’s detention, there’s a dance scene
- Emilio trying to cry, making me laugh
- Judd Nelson
- five people coming together for a day only to be ripped apart by cruel fate
- the jock gets a girl, the bad boy gets a girl, the nerd gets to write the paper. How cruel is that?
- so much teen angst it barely fits on the screen
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Ferris Bueller is the man.
- Ferris Bueller is more clever than all adults combined
- Rich kids running around the big city being rude to poor people
- Everyone at the parade breaks into dance
- Charlie Sheen as the criminal at the police station
- Matthew Broderick never ages
Weird Science
I’m not sure what the plot is in this movie, but it’s great. Here come the bullets:
- Anthony Michael Hall as the nerd
- Robert Downey Jr as the rich asshole
- Wyatt and the nerd make a supermodel in their computer who comes to life
- a biker gang crashes the house party
- a nuclear bomb shows up in the middle of the house
- the hot chicks inexplicably fall for the nerds
That’s it for the list. Here’s a piece of 80s blasphemy: I hate Duckie. He’s not charming. I tried watching Pretty In Pink last night and I had to stop it because I wanted to punch him in the face. John Hughes and the 80s film were certainly a cornerstone in my teenage years; they don’t make movies like these any more.
Maybe that’s a good thing.
